Showing posts with label Susan Cain. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Susan Cain. Show all posts

Tuesday, October 14, 2014

QUIET PEOPLE AND THE RV LIFE




Susan Cain’s excellent book Quiet appears at first to be a shallow, pop-psych sort of book designed to comfort shy people. I read it mostly because it popped up on a site for e-books and it looked like a book people might be talking about. She presents some fascinating information, though. One item that especially stood out for me is that introversion does not equal shyness. Someone who is gregarious can also treasure time alone, and a shy person can be friendly and talkative in the right circumstances. In addition, Cain cites research showing that introverts are very sensitive to stimulation; too many people or too much noise can overwhelm them. Extroverts, on the other hand, seem to need more stimulation than average.

RV life may seem best suited to extroverts. In any campground, the RVs seem to huddle around one rather noisy area, even when many empty campsites are available. The campers sit out under their awnings, hang up welcoming lights, invite passersby to have some beer or wine and enjoy a campfire. Meeting other campers in this way can be very pleasant, though it is unlikely to lead to lasting friendships.

Luckily for some of us introverts, it is easy to get away from this sort of enforced conviviality. In most campgrounds, there are some quiet campsites that encourage contemplation rather than sociability. Being both shy and introverted, I prefer these sites. It is always possible to stroll around the campground and meet other people if I am in the mood.

For all of us, the Winnebago View and similar small motorhomes can provide just the right balance of friendliness and solitude. There is room inside for a few extroverts to chat and have a meal, even in weather that can make the ubiquitous picnic table unusable. The small dimensions of the View’s exterior, on the other hand, enable squeezing into small sites that cannot be used by those huge, annoying motorhomes that always seem to have generators running, and whose owners are far too stimulating for introverts to cope with.

As Cain points out, understanding ourselves and those around us in terms of introversion and extroversion makes life easier. Knowing that a noisy RV neighbor actually needs more stimulation than I do makes me a bit more tolerant, and knowing that frequent aloneness is essential for me gives me the freedom to retreat to the View without feeling any shame.