THE UPSIDE OF GROWING OLD

Everyone is aware of the downsides of growing older—the physical deterioration, the loss of short-term memory, medical and other financial issues, and so forth. But researchers are beginning to find that there are advantages to aging, too. Articles on the Web refer to improvements in the “middle-aged brain” over the teen-aged brain, for instance. (They often ignore what happens as the “middle-aged brain” becomes the old brain, though.) Even for the elderly, improvements are demonstrated in calmness, happiness, and finding multidimensional answers to questions.

I hope the research is right. Heaven knows, we aging people need all the encouragement we can get. For myself, I take these results with a grain of salt and a sense of humor. Here is my own list of advantages of growing older:

• I can take an afternoon—or morning or evening—nap without apologizing.
• No one expects me to do anything more athletic than walking.
• When I forget a name, I can simply shrug and say, “Senior moment!”
• I stopped dyeing my hair a few years ago. Whom was I trying to kid?
• I can add a column of figures without using a calculator.
• I will never again cook dinner for more than six people.
• If I take a class, it will be for my enjoyment. There will be no grade or report card.
• Driving my RV does not make me feel ridiculous.
• Having seen some of the alternatives, I no longer fear sudden death.
• Flat, comfy shoes.
• I can parallel park, and can drive a car with a manual gearshift.
• Social Security and Medicare may last through my lifetime.
• I can flirt shamelessly with young men without seeming like a cougar.
• Alumni events no longer seem like competitive sports.
• In restaurants, I can choose simple foods I enjoy rather than overspiced, overpriced “fusion foods” or other trendy items.
• I remember when TV was worth watching, with Ernie Kovacs, Alistair Cooke, and Sid Caesar and Imogene Coca. And the old radio programs, such as Fred Allen, Jack Benny, and the Inner Sanctum.
• Senior discounts, especially the National Parks Golden Age pass.
• People hold doors open for me.
• When the newest word-processing program comes out, I do not have to learn how to use it. I learned each one, starting with WordStar in the eighties. Enough, already!
• When I play my old vinyl records, I can feel part of the current retro trend.
• There is no pressure to go upscale; I can happily continue to downsize.
• I enjoy the AARP magazine.

Being young had its moments, but so does being elderly. For everything there is a season.

 

Advantages of aging, aging brain,

RURAL LIFE, AGING, AND THE WEB

About fifteen years ago I wrote Recollecting the Forties, a small book about my childhood in rural Michigan in the 1940s. Looking back in 2000, I judged rural life rather harshly. I had never been able to romanticize country life as some writers do, and felt in general that urban life was preferable. As soon as I graduated from college, I happily moved on to a city. For the next fifty years, living in Chicago, New York, and San Francisco, I took advantage of urban delights.

Today my attitude has changed. It has been several years since I moved away from the San Francisco Bay area, and there are few things I miss. Living in the Sierra Nevada Mountains seems exciting enough at this time of my life (and in fact, the Wild West atmosphere here sometimes is more exciting than I care for). The ethnic restaurants that once charmed me in San Francisco appeal to me less now than ordinary Midwestern foods from years ago. I still love the museums that can be found only in cities, but frequent travel in a motorhome makes it possible to visit them without being limited to those in one area. Many years of concerts and theaters were enough; now I am content to watch Netflix movies or DVDs from the library (which are also considerably cheaper than live entertainment!), and to listen to recorded music.  Books—hardbound, audiobooks, e-books—are all easily available from the local library or through interlibrary loan. I can write or edit more easily than I would have dreamed possible in the pre-computer years..

Much of what I can enjoy today is made possible by my computer and e-book reader. Luckily, the World Wide Web is available almost everywhere. When traveling in our motorhome, I can access it in libraries or coffee shops. Some campgrounds have Wi-Fi also.

Older adults like me are statistically less likely to use the Web than younger people who have grown up with modern technology, but our use is growing rapidly. When the population ages further, we will change the statistics. As with any unfamiliar skill, training is essential. For those of us who have no grandchildren, many senior centers and libraries offer classes that help new users learn to navigate the Web. Though education and affluence are important factors in computer use, as prices continue to drop, most people of all ages will become more likely to go online.

The Web can’t do everything for us. I miss the Unitarian churches that seem to be found only in cities, and e-books are not as satisfactory as real books in many ways. Convenient as email is, it does not have the permanence and appeal of stationery and handwriting.

There is also a down side to the Web, of course. It can be a tremendous time-waster, but so can television or trashy reading. Novice users can quickly stray onto sites where they may be scammed, and training needs to include cautions about that danger. All in all, though, the Web can make life for older adults much richer than it was in the 1940s.

INSOMNIA

One of the best things about retirement is being able to sleep late at least some of the time. For many years when I was in school or working, I had to get up very early even if I had gone to bed late.  As a result of being sleepy I often tended to eat or drink too much, and found it hard to concentrate. I would have been healthier and happier if I could have slept more. Like most students and office workers, though, I had no choice. Now that I am retired, I often choose to stay in bed!

The joy of sleeping is occasionally interrupted by insomnia—typically for me at three o’ clock in the morning. I may toss and turn for an hour or more before going back to sleep. Surprisingly, I have insomnia more often at home than when traveling in our motorhome. This may be because I am more relaxed when away from the annoyances that go along with home ownership.

 As people age, we tend to go to bed earlier and rise earlier than when we were younger. However, insomnia interferes with sleep for many of us. Some of us wake up extremely early and are unable to go back to sleep. Worrying about problems may cause sleeplessness. In addition, age affects the type of sleep people have. The deepest, most restful sleep is called non-REM (rapid eye movement). The elderly tend to spend less time in non-REM sleep and more time in REM sleep, when there is more dreaming.

However insomnia affects people, it can leave them tired and irritable. They may find it hard to think clearly, may feel depressed, and even may be more likely to have falls and accidents if they are not well rested.

Over-the-counter or prescription sleep medicines may help, but they are a temporary aid for insomnia. Developing good sleep habits and treating physical or emotional problems that may affect sleep can lead to a permanent improvement. Sleep habits that can help include:

•  Provide a safe, restful environment for sleeping. Lock the doors and windows of the home, have a telephone and lamp within easy reach of the bed, and turn on nightlights in the hallways and bathroom. Don’t watch television there or read thrillers in bed. Have a pillow that supports your head and neck properly and enough blankets in cold weather.

•  Never smoke in bed. If a heating pad is used, be sure it is turned off before you fall asleep.

• Do not eat large meals or drink coffee or alcohol in the evening. Drink less liquid of any type during the evening if it makes you get up to use the bathroom at night.
•  Exercise during the day, not within three hours of bedtime. Try not to nap during the day if you have trouble sleeping at night.

•  In daytime, get out in the sunlight.

•  At bedtime, do anything nontoxic that you know will help you sleep: Drink a little milk, make a to-do list for the next day so that you will not lie awake thinking about things you need to do, or do whatever else you find effective.

For many people, these habits will help greatly. Some conditions, though, call for more extreme measures. If a medicine is causing insomnia, it may be possible to substitute another drug for it. Some disorders that interfere with sleep can be cured or alleviated. Anti-anxiety drugs are useful for some people.

One sleep-disturbing condition is apnea. The apnea sufferer stops breathing periodically during sleep, gasping for air and snoring loudly. During the day, apnea causes sleepiness. Left untreated, it can even cause hypertension, stroke, or loss of memory. Specialists in sleep problems can diagnose sleep apnea and treat it. The standard treatment includes a device that delivers what is called continuous positive air pressure (CPAP), which pushes air into the lungs during the sleep. Other treatments may use dental devices or surgery.

Other conditions that can cause sleep disorders are restless legs syndrome and periodic limb movement disorder. With restless legs syndrome, which tends to be worse at night, people feel sensations in their legs such as tingling, pins and needles, or crawling. Periodic limb movement disorder makes people jerk and kick their legs often during sleep. Medications for both conditions can be prescribed.

Anything that interferes with sleep should not be ignored. As Macbeth said in despair, "sleep knits up the raveled sleave of care," restoring us every morning.

(Much of this post is based on my reference book Geriatrics [Greenwood Press, 2011].)

HAVING SECOND THOUGHTS

Enjoying Yosemite's Bridalview Falls

A couple of months ago I had really intended to end this blog, and to begin another that would focus on aging. But then I thought it over, and realized that many of my Rovin' Crone ponderings are about my own aging and how I deal with it.
I hope to go on living in both a more positive and more leisurely way than when I was younger. To quote Studs Terkel, “Take it easy, but take it!” So, the Rovin' Crone is back.

Slowing down isn't always easy. In middle age we are under constant pressure to produce, to contribute, to achieve. Trying to live up to our own and others' expectations becomes a habit.


We owe ourselves some "harvest years," though. After a professional lifetime of writing and editing books for others to read, I am luxuriating in reading for my own pleasure and knowledge. Though I will always prefer "real" books, I have an e-reader that is very helpful when we are traveling or when the lighting conditions are poor. (Like many elderly people, I need bright light to read easily.)


Another way I am enjoying these years is traveling, especially to the national parks. For various reasons I saw only a few of the parks when I was younger, and now I am making up for lost time. Having a motorhome helps greatly; I always have a bathroom and kitchen near by!

TO EXPLORE OR TO SETTLE?

 
In a long-ago class in animal behavior, I learned that some animals—probably mice—have alternative alleles in their genome, variations that affect a facet of their behavior. Individuals that inherit one of the variations (“settlers”) tend to settle down and exploit their home environment; individuals that inherit the other (“explorers”) tend to move on and explore new territories. There are obvious advantages for the species as a whole: The settlers can make maximum use of their current environment; the explorers can extend the group’s range if they have the right adaptations for it. It is a good example of Darwinian selection.

Humans, too, seem to fall into these two broad categories. In U.S. history, some immigrants from Europe settled down on the east coast while others moved on to the Midwest. Later, some of the more adventurous went farther west. Eventually, some reached California, with the Pacific Ocean being a natural boundary. Today immigrants from Asia and Central America are repeating the pattern in the opposite direction.

I may be more the explorer type. After growing up in the Midwest, then trying but rejecting life in New York, I moved to California. I love this state, and actually settled for 25 years in the San Francisco Bay area before moving to the Sierras, but now it may be time to move on. El Dorado County has only limited charms, and there is still so much to explore.

When I go back to school reunions in Michigan, I am struck by the difference between myself and some of my old classmates. Some of them have stayed on family farms that were prosperous in the past, where their ancestors were important community members. Today large agribusinesses are taking over, and the family farms are disappearing. The “settlers” now find themselves struggling for survival in a much-changed environment.

Other “settlers” have been more fortunate. Not being tied to the land, they have thrived in their professions, established families, and been good citizens. Their lives have been more stable than mine, and possibly more rewarding. I sometimes envy them and wonder if my drifting lifestyle has been a mistake, but I don’t think so. Each place where I have lived has brought new adventures and new opportunities. My RV life has been the latest episode in a life that has sometimes been difficult, but has never been boring.

So, whether I stay in El Dorado County or not, I am going to move on in one respect. For the past two years, I have blogged as the rovin’ crone. Blogging has been a new and pleasant experience, but I feel I have little more to say about RVing. Probably I will begin a new blog soon, on other subjects and under a new name. When I do, a final post here will give the details.

Many thanks to those who have commented here or in emails! You have helped make blogging a rewarding pastime.

 

 

QUIET PEOPLE AND THE RV LIFE

Susan Cain’s excellent book Quiet appears at first to be a shallow, pop-psych sort of book designed to comfort shy people. I read it mostly because it popped up on a site for e-books and it looked like a book people might be talking about. She presents some fascinating information, though. One item that especially stood out for me is that introversion does not equal shyness. Someone who is gregarious can also treasure time alone, and a shy person can be friendly and talkative in the right circumstances. In addition, Cain cites research showing that introverts are very sensitive to stimulation; too many people or too much noise can overwhelm them. Extroverts, on the other hand, seem to need more stimulation than average.

RV life may seem best suited to extroverts. In any campground, the RVs seem to huddle around one rather noisy area, even when many empty campsites are available. The campers sit out under their awnings, hang up welcoming lights, invite passersby to have some beer or wine and enjoy a campfire. Meeting other campers in this way can be very pleasant, though it is unlikely to lead to lasting friendships.

Luckily for some of us introverts, it is easy to get away from this sort of enforced conviviality. In most campgrounds, there are some quiet campsites that encourage contemplation rather than sociability. Being both shy and introverted, I prefer these sites. It is always possible to stroll around the campground and meet other people if I am in the mood.

For all of us, the Winnebago View and similar small motorhomes can provide just the right balance of friendliness and solitude. There is room inside for a few extroverts to chat and have a meal, even in weather that can make the ubiquitous picnic table unusable. The small dimensions of the View’s exterior, on the other hand, enable squeezing into small sites that cannot be used by those huge, annoying motorhomes that always seem to have generators running, and whose owners are far too stimulating for introverts to cope with.

As Cain points out, understanding ourselves and those around us in terms of introversion and extroversion makes life easier. Knowing that a noisy RV neighbor actually needs more stimulation than I do makes me a bit more tolerant, and knowing that frequent aloneness is essential for me gives me the freedom to retreat to the View without feeling any shame.

 

 

 

 

 

WEATHERING THE RV LIFE

One of the few times when we found RV life daunting was a few years ago in Alberta. We had visited the stunning Dinosaur Provincial Park, had become absorbed, had stayed too long, and had as usual trusted to fate and our parking fairy to provide a campground for the night. That was a busy time and place, so no campground spaces were to be found. However, a helpful park employee told us about a nearby creekside area having tent sites. We drove there and settled down for the evening, feeling lucky to have a place to stay.

The rain began soon. It came down gently at first, then harder and harder as darkness fell. Lightning sparked across the sky, and thunder crashed. Worst of all was the wind, almost threatening to capsize the RV. We tried to see the creek through the blackness, not sure whether it was overflowing. Some tenters had tied a large rubber raft to a tree. There was just enough light for us to see the raft repeatedly flung up into the air, then heaved down onto the ground.

I can’t remember if we slept at all that night. The next morning, the rain had died down, leaving a flooded landscape, and we ventured out to the toilets. Several younger campers were there, having spent the night under the only available roof. They had made a party of the occasion.

If we had gone to a motel for the night, we would have had a good night’s sleep.  Weather scarcely affects motel visitors, who can insulate themselves from the outside world, watch TV, use Wi-Fi, and so on. Just as they probably do at home. But, we are closer to the real world in an RV. The occasional night of terror seems like a reasonable price to pay for experiencing an ecosystem first-hand.

As RVers, we can also escape threatening weather quickly. If a hurricane or blizzard is forecast, we can drive to s more hospitable area. Climate change may make the RV life even more appealing in the coming years, when some campgrounds that are pleasantly warm now become like Death Valley.

LIVING NEAR THE KING FIRE

Ordinarily we have to travel to find much excitement, because our homes in El Dorado County are in a scenic area that is generally bucolic. Lately, though, the excitement came to us. While out for a Sunday morning walk about ten days ago I was listening to a local radio broadcast, and heard something about a fire north of us. The sky was clear, and I couldn’t smell smoke, so I ignored any danger for a while.

Soon we learned that a fire was burning over several hundred acres of forested land just north of Pollock Pines. Luckily, the homes there are scattered and surrounded by defensible (cleared) spaces, making it unlikely that they were in much danger. Surely, we thought, firefighters would soon bring the fires under control, and that would be an end of it.

We were wrong. Over the next week the fire went on burning, spreading first to 2800 acres, then to 10,000 acres. On one particularly hot and windy day it swelled to 80,000 acres, more than a hundred square miles. A giant pyrocumulus cloud spanned the sky, and smoke and ashes began raining down. El Dorado County had the dubious distinction of  having the largest California wildfire of 2014.

Now, the fire is still spreading. It has grown to more than 95,000 acres, and at its easternmost edge is only a few miles from beautiful Lake Tahoe. A dozen homes have been destroyed, thousands of acres of forest have burned. Thousands of people were evacuated from their homes temporarily; some have gone back to intact homes, others have found smoke or worse. Thankfully, no lives have been lost, though four firefighters (including a prison inmate who was working on the front lines) have been injured.

Highway 50 is not too wide at Pollock Pines, and a successful effort has been made to keep the fire from spreading across it. Only that highway and a reservoir lie between hundreds of homes, including ours, and the fire.

Highway 50 is no longer “the loneliest highway in America.” Thousands of firefighters from hundreds of miles away, even from Idaho and other states, have hurried along it night and day. Overhead, helicopters carry water, and planes drop fire retardant on the flames. All along the road, people have posted signs thanking those who have come to help.

Fifteen miles to the west of Pollock Pines, the county fairground in Placerville is being used for the many cattle and other animals that had to be moved out of the burning area. Fire engines, bulldozers, and huge mobile dormitories for the firefighters fill the parking lot of a nearby Raley’s supermarket.

As the fire has moved to the northeast, we have been less affected by it. The air is clear again here, though there is still some smoke in the Lake Tahoe area. Life seems normal again in many ways. This morning it is even raining, for the first time in months. The rain is a double-edged sword, though. Falling on the clayey soil here, it will make it harder for firefighters to keep their footing.

The fire will probably continue raging for weeks. Now more than 40% contained, it cannot last through the approaching rainy season, but the effects will be long-lasting for the scarred land, the burned forests, some homeowners, and the wildlife.

 

 

 

THE PERFECT CUP OF TEA

For about twenty years off and on, I have been part of an online discussion group, the Copyediting-L. Though the group’s obvious focus is on subjects of professional interest to copyeditors—grammar, current usage, job opportunities, and so on—often the conversation veers into more personal areas of interest, such as food and drink.

One of the best-known contributors to the group was David Ibbetson, whom we called the Ib. He was a very kind and well-informed Englishman who had moved to Montreal, where few of us ever had the chance to meet him. We were all saddened to hear of his death several years ago. Many of us benefited from his editorial advice and amusing birthday wishes, but what I most remember about the Ib are his simple but specific directions for making the perfect cup of tea:

Tea Made Properly

Loose tea leaves

Boiling water

The only "container" you need for your tea is a teapot. Fill it with nearly boiling water to heat it. When the kettle boils, dump out the teapot quickly and add 1 teaspoon of loose tea per cup plus 1 for the pot. Pour in the freshly boiling water, cover the teapot, and let it steep. How long? Tastes vary.
The tea leaves will sink to the bottom of the pot; if you worry about an occasional one ending in your cup, pour the tea into the cup through a tea strainer. Silver, preferably.

I agree you need good loose tea; there are lots of places online where you can buy it. Some people say the teapot has to be brown, but that has been contested.[1]

Ordinarily I avoid tea, preferring a strong blend of coffee and chicory such as French Market in the morning, or a glass of white wine in the evening. However, by following the Ib’s directions, and using Market Spice, one of the few kinds of tea I actually enjoy, I can prepare tea that lifts my spirits as much as a cup of coffee or glass of wine, without any side effects. Drinking a cup of Market Spice tea is one of those small things that cost little but contribute to happiness.

Life is full of stress, and it is easy to become discouraged about the state of the world and about outlooks for the future. Being a liberal environmentalist, I worry about the changing global climate, about the NRA, about overpopulation, about creationists, about diseases such as Ebola, about drought, about floods, and about right-wingers in general. But if I go for a walk in the woods, within about twenty minutes I can see my worries in perspective. I may be Chicken Little, but so far the sky is not falling.

While walking is one of my favorite ways to seize some happiness in the midst of chaos, there are others. Buying a small native plant, planting it in a shady window box, and watering it can give me much satisfaction, even in the current drought when water is limited. Finding a good whodunit at the library can make me giddy. Sketching in my nature journal makes me feel akin to Darwin. Looking at the night sky with binoculars reduces my problems to trivia. Sending emails to friends thousands of miles away recalls happy times shared with them. I return the smiles of small children.

I am not a Pollyanna, perennially glad in spite of what is happening around me. In fact, I tend to be cynical and pessimistic in general. But finding some joy in small things reminds me of important broader facets of life—the history and philosophy of science, healthy and delicious foods, literature, the conservation of natural resources, friendship and love. It can all start with the perfect cup of tea.

---

[1] David Ibbetson. In More Food for Thought. New York: Copyediting-L, 2005.

TOO UNHAPPY TO BE KIND

The poet A.E.Housman  is usually associated with World War I and Shropshire, but he also wrote a moving poem about Londoners, in which he said:

“The mortal sickness of a mind

Too unhappy to be kind.
Undone with misery, all they can
Is to hate their fellow man;
And till they drop they needs must still
Look at you and wish you ill.” [1]

Anyone who has studied the faces on city streets has seen what Housman did—busy, tense people who ignore others or are rude to them. New Yorkers and other large-city dwellers, particularly, are inclined to treat others with brusqueness or actual unkindness, probably because they are dealing with stressful city life themselves. (However, in disasters or even minor difficulties, they can be surprisingly helpful. It seems to be everyday life that makes them miserable.)

Small towns and rural areas are not free from the phenomenon, either. When I shop in the local supermarket, I see shoppers who look tense and tired. They may treat clerks or other shoppers with discourtesy. It is rare to see someone who looks relaxed and happy.

The main insight I gained years ago in group therapy is that we have common troubles. We are not really alone when we feel lonely or mistreated; others are facing similar worries. Sometimes, as in group therapy, sharing our feelings with others can help greatly. Even if we keep our anxieties to ourselves, though, remembering our commonality is useful. Being understanding can also come easier with age. When we have passed through various sorrows ourselves, we can recognize the signs in others. Of course, the problems of aging can also make us more inclined to self-pity.

My friend Ruth (who has plenty of her own problems) uses the signature line, “Be kind. Everyone you meet is struggling with something.” What a simple, powerful idea! The barista who overfills the coffee cup may have a husband in Afghanistan; the jerk who cuts you off in traffic may have just lost his job; the woman who is dressed rather bizarrely may have just been released from a hospital. Knowing the whole story may explain much. For instance, just the other day, the RV near us in an otherwise silent campground had a noisy generator running for hours. We were on the verge of complaining when we learned that the owner must use an electronic medical device at night requiring a fully charged battery. What a narrow escape we had from being cruel!

 

---

[1] Housman. A.E. 1896. In my own shire, if I was sad. From A Shropshire Lad. Avon Publishing, Inc.